Late Friday night, I returned home from a lovely dessert with friends (champagne and a cheesecake brownie, shared between the four of us--delicious!) to an email that I had been waiting for for weeks. Except the news it bore was not what I had been hoping for.
The next morning I woke up feeling pretty down. In addition to the headache that crying before bed always gives me, I just felt like I had let everyone down: myself, my family, and Leah. I just wanted to lay in bed all day. Ignore the sun. Just wallow in my misery.
However, a few days before I had made plans with a friend that I knew I couldn't miss out on. So, after finally getting dressed and trying to pull myself together, my friend Clare and I got our bikes and our provisions and biked up the Danish coast to a beautiful park called Dyrehaven.
Though we never saw any deer (which really just means I'll have to go back and try again), we spent hours laying in the grass drinking wine and eating grapes and brownies, just talking about everything under the sun. Books, movies, racism, summertime, relationships, biking, travels... The combination of a lack of electronics--no internet here, sir!--the good conversation, and the beautiful springtime sun made my troubles simply melt away. I went to bed happy and exhausted, a total turnaround from my state when I woke up that morning.
Again, this semester, I have proven to myself that I have control over myself and my emotions. I know everything will be ok.Yesterday taught me again that I am resilient. I am strong enough to overcome difficulties. Creative enough to come up with new solutions. I am not a wallower, even when I really want to be. I have the power to change my situation and my attitude. I am so much stronger than I think I am.